I was a lucky one. The constant feeds were draining me and I needed sleep badly. So, as lots of families do, we introduced a bottle and I started pumping so that my husband could split up feeding sessions. I became best friends with my pump and found myself waking up several times a night to pump to support milk production.
I was still waking up multiple times a night to pump. I was still in pain. I was still not getting much free time since I had to not only breastfeed but pump throughout the day.
I was still not in control of my body and had to question every single thing I ate or drank to make sure baby was getting his nutrients. I was growing resentful of my husband for not having to suffer. I hated it and it was single-handedly disturbing my entry into motherhood. Babies pinch and wiggle and grab your face and hair… or stop nursing suddenly and take a look around, exposing your full nipple to the free world.
Basically, it comes down to this: I can only revel in the beauty of the mother-child relationship for so long and then there are places to go, people to see, and other mouths to feed thankfully, they eat solids. Many women hate pregnancy I love it or the terrible twos love that too! So despite my huffs and puffs, here are 5 most selfish reasons I breastfeed my babies:.
I have a vanity issue. Anything that causes you to burns calories just by breathing is worth a little boredom. I have an irrational fear that my son will forget me. Let me repeat for all the new and working moms out there: this is a completely irrational fear. It's hard to reason with a baby, though. Still, since he was gaining weight well, nobody thought to check.
Due to my fast letdown, Odin became a lazy feeder. He got accustomed to having milk fire-hosing down his throat in the first couple of minutes, and once it slows down he can't be bothered to do any work. Again, we've been getting around that with the help of the pacifier. When the letdown slows he pops off the boob and starts frantically looking for the pacifier, mouth gaping open like a baby bird. I'll give it to him for a minute, then pull it out jam my boob back into his mouth.
This works a bit, but less and less as we go. Our best feeds are the first two of the day, and then it starts to go progressively downhill. By bedtime, he's basically impossible to nurse. I started giving him a bottle of expressed breast milk for his final feed of the day after I read that another blogger was giving her baby - who is also a fussy feeder in the evening - a bottle for the last feed of the day and I was like, wait, you can do that?!
Yes you can! And while I'd fight to keep him on the boob long enough for a meagre feed before bed, he'll chug a 7-ounce bottle in no time flat. Friends, mommas, here's the deal.
Breast milk is a magical, miracle food that's perfectly comprised to be in tune with your baby's needs. It offers all of the essential nutrients your baby needs, immunity, as well as warmth and a bonding experience. You know what's more important than breast feeding? That your baby just gets some damn food. Here's an excellent study using sibling comparisons to estimate the effects of breastfeeding. It doesn't come out as far ahead of formula as you might think.
And if you hate breastfeeding or it's so frustrating that you're literally screaming at your baby to just effing eat I was screaming. I mean, I was screaming at him at times you need to know that it's ok to use formula.
One night when Odin was four months old, I didn't have any expressed milk to offer him in a bottle. I've been staying up well past my bedtime to pump each night, and the previous night I had just been too tired.
When I thought about putting him to the breast and battling through a pre-bed feed, my nipples literally inverted themselves and ran screaming out of the room.
But then I decided to talk to myself like I'd talk to a friend. Would I judge a friend for giving her difficult-to-feed baby formula?
I would not. In fact, would I suggest she try it? Yes I would. So, I did. It went great. He drained that bottle like he was doing a keg stand, let out a mighty belch, and then went to sleep happy and satisfied. And so did I. I persisted with breast feeding my difficult to feed baby for six months because it's convenient, it's free, and I wanted to get my October baby through cold and flu season with as much immune support as possible. When the going was really tough I was just taking things one feeding at a time.
I'm a bit control freaky, and I liked that my baby depends on me for his food. But, honestly, we were both ready to be done. There is such stigma around formula, but the truth is that if you can afford it, live in a part of the world with access to clean and safe drinking water, and are down with cleaning and sterilizing bottles, then it's no big deal.
The breast is best messaging we're bombarded with should really be shifted to fed is best in most cases. If you were living somewhere in the world where you had to walk several miles collect water, gather enough firewood to start a fire to boil water with, then formula may not be a good idea.
If you live somewhere in the world without access to potable water this includes some parts of the US and Canada , then formula may not be a good idea. If you are struggling financially and therefore prone to watering down formula, rely on breastfeeding for pregnancy prevention, etc, etc, etc, then the WHO recommendations of nothing but the breast for six months should absolutely apply.
That is not my situation, however, and I suspect that if you're reading this blog post, it isn't the reality for you either. It's ok to stop breastfeeding just because you don't like it.
It's your body, and you get to decide what to do with it. And again, sanity is a highly valued trait in a mother. The stress of motherhood eventually cracks everyone. Just for a minute, from time to time. And then we quickly glue ourselves back together so we can resume holding that which needs holding. And quite often, that glue with which we piece ourselves back into the whole vessels we need to be, is wine. When I was breastfeeding I remember staring at a bottle of wine and resenting every last delicious drop inside it.
Drink it. Since I was nearing the brink of insanity, I took his advice. I had pumped earlier that day and had some breast milk stored already that we could alternate with formula as my son transitioned into bottle feeding, so I felt less guilty still plenty guilty though about giving up. I opened the wine and was able to just relax on the couch like a real human again, for the first time in months.
It felt so, so good and honestly, we were all better off after we opened that bottle. I haven't looked back since. Both of my boys have been formula fed and they're both perfect. The moral of the story is that the best kind of baby is a fed baby.
We should support full tummies, not bash breastfeeding abandonment. What's best for one person isn't necessarily best for another, and what's best for all of us is the support of one another. Here are 12 reasons you shouldn't feel guilty about hating breastfeeding. Formula Is Very Beneficial.
Your Baby Won't Judge You. Bleeding Nipples, Anyone? Sometimes You Just Need Wine. November See All Trying Birth After.
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